Questions and Answers

Do you have a question? Whether you're curious about something, or want to address personal issues, don't hesitate to ask Evelyn using this feature to get your answers.

Evelyn B. Block

Evelyn B. Block, is a developmental psychologist and a native New Yorker. She has had over 25 years of experience as an educator at the elementary and university levels, as a child and family therapist working with children with special needs and their families, as a consultant to corporations on work and family issues and as a parent. She is a published author; and lives with her family in Manhattan Beach, CA.
Previously Asked
  hi Evelyn i am a mother of a special needs teen. my son is 16 he has been diagnosed with pdd and they say he is adhd my son is at a high functioning level. we have one big problem that breaks my heart, he wants to have a friend .he says he watches kids at school but they wont include him in their circles.my son yearns for a friend so bad and i dont know what to do he is a good kid . kids judge him and they dont even take time to know who my son is, if they took the time,they would see what a kind hearted compassionate person he is . please, if you could help me with this issue i would really appreciate it . It breaks my heart to see my son hurt like this and i dont know what to do . My son needs friends please can you help thank you for your time a heart broken mom ...yours truly cheryl
Posted by: CHERYL, garden grove , ca
Dear Cheryl:
    Every development stage of your child’s life brings new and different challenges for both parent and child. For children with PDD and ADHD, the transition to adolescence is further complicated. Your son is in the normal developmental stage of wanting his own identity and independence and yet yearning to be part of a group.  Wanting to fit in is the form that this takes at this stage.  The first and most important way for you, as his parent, to help him, is to be empathetic. As you empathize with him, he may come to learn to better understand and embrace the ways in which he is different from his peers.
    Because the teen years are fraught with emotional challenges, this may be the time where your son could greatly benefit from some individual counseling. A trained counselor can give your son a private and personal space where he can better learn the social skills he needs to be included and make a friend.  Joining a support group, such as the Friendship Circle, could enable him to make friends with other teens with whom he has much in common and offer him an opportunity to learn and use social skills. The special events these groups offer also allow your teen to have fun in a recreational setting with h is peers.
    Several high schools now offer peer alliances for teens like your son. If his school doesn’t have one, it might be something you could start. With a peer alliance, typical students who don’t condone teasing or victimization of peers act as a social circle at school. They are willing to “hang out” with socially challenged teens and monitor how others treat them. They help interpret behavior for both groups of teens and everyone benefits.
    Another idea is to provide your son with some reading material from which he can learn about what other teens are like and learn more about himself.  One book that might interest him is Freaks, Geeks and Asperger Syndrome: A User Guide to Adolescence. The book is written by Luke Jackson, a young man with Asperger’s.
    The important thing to remember is that adolescence is a stage and it is likely that things will improve for your son as he gets older and learns to interact better with his peers, and as his peers get older and they become more understanding and accepting. Don’t lose sight of the fact that being the parent of a teen is always challenging and remember to take good care of yourself.
Evelyn

Evelyn B. Block
  HI evelyn I was wondering if you could help me. I am in a college class it's child development, well anyhow I have to do this project and I have been all over this web trying to find something about special ed teens. I was wondering what kind of classes they take and how do teachers help them through their work. For example are there certain methods you can use? Is there any way you can help me out on this subject? thanks laura
Posted by: laura, louisa, ky

Dear Laura:

The goal for teens with learning disabilities and special needs continues to be inclusion. To the extent possible, they are included in the regular classrooms, with support as needed. Some teens will spend most of their day in a single classroom with special education teachers and leave that classroom for activities such as lunch, art, gym, or other classes in which they can successfully participate. Others may be attending school in a regional center or private setting. Nonetheless, while most regular classroom instruction is delivered by lecture, reading text, and visual aids, teens with special needs require more variety in their learning materials, additional time to process information and teachers who are responsive to their individual learning styles and who will adapt instructional materials to meet the needs of the student. In special education, this is called differentiated instruction.

 

Like most teens, students with special needs eagerly anticipate life beyond the high school years. Whether the student is heading to college, employment or some other post high school alternative, all young people must develop an array of skills to successfully adapt to adult life in the community. These daily living skills include meal preparation, money management, housekeeping, self-care, getting around, and planning leisure time and activities. Students benefit from opportunities to learn and demonstrate new skills and independent decision making. Some students with special needs remain in school until they are 21, affording an even greater opportunity to prepare them for life beyond the classroom.
  I am a Friendship Circle volunteer, and i find it very rewarding. I would like to ask, what is the best way to treat someone with Autism?
Posted by: John, MB, CA

Dear John,

First, I’d like to applaud you for your efforts. I know the children enjoy their time with volunteers like you.

Autism is a complex neurobiological disorder that typically appears during the first three years of life and lasts throughout a person's lifetime. Today, 1 in 150 individuals is diagnosed with autism. Autism impairs a person's ability to communicate and relate to others. It is also associated with rigid routines and repetitive behaviors. Symptoms can range from very mild to severe. There is no single treatment for autism. Most children with autism benefit from highly structured educational programs.

Some of the most common interventions such as Applied Behavior Analysis, Speech-Language Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Relationship Development Intervention and Sensory Integration Therapy have shown tremendous promise for some children. Parents often explore several treatments including dietary changes, and use those which they find most effective for their particular child.

Unfortunately, while there is currently no cure or “best treatment” for autism, there are a wide variety of treatments that have been shown to help many, but not all, children with the disorder.

With continued research, we may some day find a cure. If you’d like to learn more about particular treatments, the Autism Speaks/Cure Autism Now website is an outstanding resource. www.autismspeaks.org

  What does the term “Special Needs” mean?
Posted by: Sam K, Manhattan Beach, CA
Special Needs is an umbrella term encompassing a large number of diagnoses. Children with special needs may have medical issues, behavioral issues, developmental disabilities, learning disabilities, or mental health issues, or some combination of needs.
Too often, the term is used to define what a child can’t do - experiences denied, foods not permitted, and activities to be avoided. The designation is really only useful for setting goals and getting services for a child.
The term is so inclusive that it fails to recognize that every child with special needs and family is unique, with different “special” needs. At the same time, use of the term recognizes that these children do require appropriate care and education, accommodations, acceptance in the family, school and community, plans for their future, and a constantly evolving adjustment of routines and expectations.

 
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